New Evidence Hillary Killed Lincoln

Since it is 23 months until the next election, we might as well get going (no time to lose!) on the 2016 talk. I think it best to republish a piece from May of last year as a little taste of what is to come. This is a joke, of course, from the the very talented Andy Borowitz of The New Yorker but, make no mistake, this is the exact type of crazy that will be coming down the road.

Photograph courtesy Library of Congress.

Fox: New Evidence Hillary Killed Lincoln

By Andy Borowitz

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In what may be the most serious allegation ever made against the former Secretary of State, Fox News Channel reported today that Hillary Clinton was involved in the conspiracy to murder President Abraham Lincoln.

The latest charge against Mrs. Clinton was reported by Fox host Sean Hannity, who said that the evidence of her role in the Lincoln assassination came mainly in the form of e-mails.

According to Mr. Hannity, “If it’s true that Hillary Clinton killed Lincoln, this could have a major impact on her chances in 2016.”

The accusation against Mrs. Clinton drew a strong response from Sen. Lindsey Graham (R.—S. Carolina): “There’s been a concerted effort by Hillary Clinton to cover up her role in President Lincoln’s murder. She has said nothing about it. This is bigger than Watergate, the Cuban missile crisis, and the Second World War put together.”

Responding to the allegation, Mrs. Clinton issued a terse statement indicating that she could not have participated in Lincoln’s assassination because she was born in 1947.

“That’s what she wants us to believe,” Sen. Graham said.


http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/fox-new-evidence-hillary-killed-lincoln

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